The first pets were cloned successfully! They are cute little kittens that look just like their Mommy. You can see a picture of them here. http://www.local6.com/news/3623918/detail.html
They look like each other too. Which is a real breakthrough in cloning.
I want one!

-K

Be sure and check out Farenheit 911. If you like Michael Moore, then check out his website at www.michaelmoore.com.

I love you too...

<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

-K

Hello and good morning my little fluffy one! I had a great time in Vegas with you and Fifi Von Monticore this weekend. I found a picture of Monticore from before we became his/her parents. Here it is.



Just a cute little puppy, who can rip your throat out!
Grrrr, ruff, meow!

-K

Hey there! Good morning my little slice of Pumperknickle. You are so awesome. Sorry about my little bitch-fest this morning. I was just grumpy, and I didn't mean to take it out on you. You know, the heat, work, this damn movie audition. It just catches up with me sometime, and I apologize if I got a bit whiney today. I can't wait to do this movie, it's going to be a welcome break from work, plus some extra duckets in our pocket. Did you get an alarm today? Are you my little pony? If you are still my little pony, stomp your hoof three times!

-K

Hi my little cat on a hot tin roof! I hope you got those fans today, 'cuz it looks like it's going to be another scorcher. Nothing new at work here, I'm a little worried about next week's check, but I'm sure something will come in. I'll just keep plugging away at it, but not working too hard... You're the best! Here is a link to some madness.

The Onion

-K

Good mornings my little kitten. I miss you already. I had fun this last week with the wedding and cousins and all. Sorry they turned out to be such bitches at the end. You are awesome. Wish me luck today, will be doing it at 2:25 P.M. Light a candle for me. Here is a link to some funny shit.

Fark

-K

Good morning my little kitten-face! I love you, and miss you terribly. Here is a link to a zebra with no stripes. He is cute, just like you.

<3

-K

Here's a link showing the great resolve of our fearless leader.

Hey baby!

Things are crazy at work right now, so I only have time for a quick note.

I love you.

I miss you.

Can't wait to hang out with you.

<3

-K

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Here's a kitten for you to play with until I get home!

Good morning my little kitten. I missed not riding to work with you. Here is a photograph of an angry cow. He is very mad, and he trampled his owner. Look into his eyes and see his fury! I miss you, and I wish you could be here with me at work. I will keep you in my thoughts all day, looking forward to spending the whole weekend with just you....and all of our guests tomorrow night. Bye Bye!

<3

-K

Good morning my little baby tiger. This is what you look like when you wake up! I'm just kidding! Muy es Mio! I love you, and I can't wait to eat a meal cooked up in our new oven.

<3

-K

Interesteing choice of advertising during an airing of Toy Soldiers. And I thought I showed too much during the movie, especially the underwear scenes. Hmpf!

<3

-K

Here is a link to a cool artist that reminds me of Christo. It is a painted iceberg. Kind of like tagging in Greenland. Good morning my cute little tiger. Thank you for this morning's ride down the K-Lane. You are awesome. I am sooooo excited about getting a new range! I will call you after I speak with Abraham.

-K

Hey baby, thanks for giving me a ride this morning. Also, thanks for blowing my hair out, it always looks awesome whenever you touch it. I just wanted to show you a link to the dude who I am trying to sell our service too. He is the one who works with Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown. Check out the link, then tell me that's not hillarious!

Sounds good to me. All we have to worry about is if a regular size oven will fit through the kitchen door. So I'll take some measurements and see if that's possible. If not, lets find a mini that has the best price!

I <3 U

-K

Here is a link to the Bush Family Values Photo Album. Their family is more fucked up than mine ever was! Did you get the second half of that movie? Isn't it trippy to hear your language? You are awesome, thanks for the coffee and eggs. You Rock!

I <3 U

-K

Good morning my little tiger! Thank you so much for breakfast, I really enjoyed having coffee and eggs with you this morning. I also had fun watching bad tv too. I am heading out to the hospital now. I will be back at the office around lunchtime, so blog back, and I'll talk to ya later.

<3 <3 <3

-K

Hoy toi toi toi toi, Blarney Stone! 'Tis the season of the Irishman. We may be short, but we're Irish! Today is such a Coogan day. And if your not Irish, that's O.K. too. May ye find your pot o' gold at the end of the rainbow!

-Coogan

Hey, good morning my little kitten. :-)

How are things going at the old fort? I have successfully faxed 1000 flyers today, and am getting slammed! Have a meeting here at the office at 2:00, then I am leaving for my audition around 3:00. I will see you and talk to you later. You are my little fluffy one, my fluffy wuffy snuffy one.

-K

That's awesome wicked good news. I still can't believe the sheisty billing practices. They made you stress for no good reason, other than to bilk the insurance companies. No wonder health insurance costs so fucking much. What a con!

Anyway, I am off to the audition, wish me luck. I will call when I get back to the office.

Love ya,

-K

Good morning my little bear cub! It's almost your birfday! You are so sweet, I love to watch you cat-nap! Here is a link to a great online game, it's known as The Penguin Game. You should only play the version marked "Yetisports part 1" - "Pengu throw". The other versions are not as fun. Goto the link, and click on the second link for the game, or the version 1 link. Have fun smackin' those penguins!

Good morning my little kitten, did you sleep well last night? I miss you, and can't wait to hand out with you tonight. We got cable!!!! Here is a link to Bush's Hotmail account. Very funny. I will talk to you later, my little bear.

-K

Yeah, Ed's still here, but it don't matter, he's totally cool, and knows I do my best. He has NEVER bothered me, except for some joking around. I found this cool link to one of my earlier commercials. It happens to be a Suger Smacks commercial starring Keith Coogan A.K.A. Keith Mitchell. Enjoy!

Tell vered to tell the caller he is viotating the "no-call" rules and that his call time and info has been recorded and that it is an $11,000 dollar fine to harrass a home number. That should get rid of him.

-K

-K

Hi, good morning my little kitten. Just thought I would provide a link to Lucky, the two legged dog. He is very cute, and fluffy. .....and so are you! I miss you, and can't wait to come home today and see you!

-K

Just wanted to point out this polar bear that turned green. Maybe he's been smokin' some o' that whacky tobbaccy? I love you more than I love green bears. In fact, I love you more than anything in this world!

-K

You are my tiger! Good morning my little kitten. Have you found your saucer of milk today? Have you found the catnip? Are you power napping near the heater? I miss my little kitten, and want to see her right away!

-K

Very funny, I just found a whole page dedicated to the fighting styles of Donald Rumsfield.

Hihihihihihihihihihihi!

Here's a little story of a salon that wants to get a liquor license. Now there's an idea that should catch on! Hi baby, how is my little kitten today? You are suuuuuuuuch a froobie. I love you, and miss you three times as much as I ever have. Can't you just quit being a hairdresser and come work with me? haha

Anyway, like I said, you are mine schlubinator! I will think of you until I see ya after 5, because after 5 I will be able to see you in person. Yaaaaiy!!
<3
-K

Hi baby!!!

I am shooting you a quick note from work. I love you and miss you every minute that I can't see your little schmushkins. In case you were wondering, this is what a baby whale looks like.

:-)
<3
-K

First of all, you should feel safe with me. When I am with you at home, at night, it would take a grizzy bear to get through me to you. You have seen me go toe to toe with clown-face, and I wouldn't hesitate for a second to do the same with the drunk asshole wife-beater next door. Since we'd rather not have that happen, the simple solution is to merely call the cops instantly when we hear shit go down next door. We will be aggressive with Abraham regarding moving them out, and doing things around our pad like the linoleum and leak in the kitchen sink. If he can't get aggressive with the next door neighbors, then we will lead the charge. We are good tenants, and should not feel afraid or intimidated by our low rent. I love you. More than you will ever know....
-K

So sorry about that. I totally spaced on it, and am glad you checked it! I know your brakes are going, and that's something we will have to deal with in the next week or so. We both have such hectic schedules now, it has been hard for me to do anything but work and sleep. I once again apologize for not checking your oil, hopefully no damage has been done. You have every right to be pissed, I use the car, but obviously have trouble cleaning it or checking it. My bad.

-K

Here is a link to Janet Jackson's breast exposure during the super-bowl halftime show.

I think we should wait until at least Thursday b-4 we drop the rent in his mailbox. You are my little fluffy wuffy one. My hootchie kootchie smootchie floofy one. Good news about the gas bill! yeah!

I love you, see ya soon,

-Keithus

Yah! You got your brushes back! Awesome! I am just chillin' at work, surfin' the net and making some calls. We are totally short-handed today (superbowl virus) so I am helping out here and there. You are my little floobie, and I miss you and can't wait to see your little shmushkins after 5:00.

You are always in my thoughts...

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

-K

This is a link for construction .

Moveon.org has alerted me of the proposed censorship of the winning "Bush in 30 seconds" spot, that WAS to be aired during the superbowl coverage on C.B.S. this year. They have decided not to air the ad. Here is a link that will let you watch the ad, and contact C.B.S. to let them know how you feel about their decision. Moveon.org superbowl ad.

Hey Froob,

Good morning, thanks for the ride this morning. You are my little kitten. I know you are going to have an awesome day today. Don't forget to "Relax into things" and have as much fun with it as if you have been working their for years. Just like every set brings me right back, you have tons of experience to ROCK manhattan beach! Don't forget where you came from, how long and hard you have worked to get here, you are totally and completely deserving of happiness and success. I know you are going to lean out there and grab that brass ring!

I love you more than Leo loved Kate on the Titanic...

Your Schloobie...

Keithus

Hi,

I learned how to make a heart for you.

<3 <3 <3

there are three hearts on this page...

I love you

-K

Hey Froobie!

Could you do me a big favor and bring some scissors to cut my little nose hairs?
That would be fantastic!
Work is cool, just dialing like mad, Kevin is here, training.... all is well...maybe a little boring but, what are ya gonna do?

I love you

-K

Just knowing that miserable failure points to George Bush AND Michael Moore AND Hillary Clinton is funny. That's all I have to say about that.

Hey baby,

Good morning! If you are reading this, then you are a froobie. I had fun with you last night, let's do it again!

Go ahead and mail out all of our bills...
Go ahead and order food....
Go ahead and hang out with dave and.... you know

I will see you a little bit after 5:00.....wearing nothing but a smile...

-K

I was super swamped today, sorry I couldn't write until now...
I will totally fill your phone up when I get home today...
That area looks great, it's right by the beach AND it's by Washington Blvd.
Maybe we could take a little drive by the salon on Saturday?
I love you, and I miss you, even when it's busy here, I'm always thinking of you.

Your Froobie,

Keithus

WOW! I just signed another person on!!! Chalk up one more sale for the Kid!

Good morning little kitten. I have moved into my new office this morning. The boss is not expected till this afternoon. I had fun last night. I hope you had a good time too. Let's do it again!!! I miss you, and I wished we worked together somehow, because I like being with you 24/7. I will check my blogs later, but right now I have important office things to do, and such, and things of that nature. Fantastic!

Governor Keith

Yes, but go for it darlin'....

No cameras in the courtroom!!! How could they do that to us? We have been loyal watchers of all trials, and now they deny us the right to watch a public trial of a public figure? I'm pissed. Thanks for your support and help, I am so going to nail this Folger's audition. Stay cool baby, I love you....
-K

Can't wait to see you either. What did you get me? HUH? What? What? I'm dying to know. You are always full of surprises. You love to give surprises, yet you can't stand it when someone has a surprise for you. You just have to know what it is, or else it eats you alive....!@!! I've seen it happen. The little kitten can't wait, can she?
-K

Great, I'm actually glad it was the stem, and not some asshole fucking with our tires. You are a super trooper for taking care of that, thanks. Hey, don't really worry about our shit showing up in search engines, you have to search for such an obscure phrase to get a hit, and as long as we keep peoples full names out of it, we should be fine. Besides, if someone that we have any beef with finds out how we really feel about them... oh well... hahahah
-K

Hey baby, how are you doin'? How's the tire, did you get it patched? Wasn't that fun?
No, just kidding. I miss you, can't wait to see your cute little face. You are such a schmoopie. OK, now I'm sounding like that baby talk episode of Seinfeld. Talk to ya in a bit.... BTW, the check for Allstate has totally cleared, we're all good...
love
-K

Thanks for the e-card, very funny... Hey! The rent check went through, so that's cool...
I miss you, and can't wait to get done with work today. Things are going great, mellow and hectic all at the same time. I wonder what movies will be on tonight? We will see. I can't wait to have dinner with my schloopie...
I love you
-K

Love it! Thanks sweetie... You are the greatest, and it's my birthday! All I can think about is your smile. I miss you, and can't wait to get home today! Meow!

Payment is in... account is being set up... my first official sale :)

Yeah, sometimes blogger gets all snafu'd. I love you! You are so cute... Thank you for giving me a ride this morning, I totally was on time, thanks again... You are so cute in the morning, like a little sleeping kitten...

That Julie! I love you too, and I have great news. I just closed a deal! Now let's hope he doesn't flake like the last guy. I don't think he will, I worked very hard to get him in and I think this will stick! Isn't that awesome? I guess I'm just learning, but still....

I will see ya a little after 5:00 p.m. but I will think about you up until then...

Love,

-K

My homepage has a link to that saddam image I did last night. It's just fun to see it on the web. How are you this morning my little kitten? ILUVU! Things are going great here at work. It's Friday! Yeah!

-K

No word yet on the new office, but it's nice to have those hours, huh? I had fun with you last night too. It's a shame we don't get those movie channels anymore, but what are ya gonna do?

-K

Yeah, that and the fact that there aren't going to be any safeguards against the immigrant workers from sending even MORE money out of this country. And just what the fuck is this "willing" shit? If you ask the 14% of this countries unemployed workers if they are willing to work, don't you think some of them would say yes? Why do we have to rely on an outside workforce?

That is so cool! I will totally help you screen and respond to those e-mails. Do you know if they are local? Isn't Craigslist cool? How are ya doing? Haw aw yuh doin'? Summer Donna. Simmer down now. Summah, Donnah.

Did you find your little surprise? Have you had breakfast? Are you a froobie? Why am I asking so many questions?

I also noticed last night that we are now getting American Movie Classics. Very Cool!
Is MTV as good as VH1 was? Or can you not tell because of the Real World marathon?

Back at work, vacations over. New year. Love my froobie...
-K

I love you this much...

And now it's raining!! Aaaargh!

Froobie, we are closer together now BECAUSE of everything we have been through together in the last 6-7 years. You are more important to me than anyone else on the planet. Sure, we have our probs, but together, we can always work through them. I just want this christmas to be me, and you, chilling like villains. I want to be close to you, to love you, and to smell you. (that sounds wierd, but it's not meant to be)
First and foremost, I want you to be happy. And I remember now what your father told me the secret was... do everything she tells me too! But I'm my own man, and one thing you haven't told me to do is thank you for being there and really being with me this whole time. We are better when we work together. And I don't want you to feel like I'm not working on this with you. I'm just a dude, but a dude in love with you!

P.S. Santa still wants to surprise you with SOMETHING! So I'll see you a few hours after work.

My little mushkin... I love you!
-K

P.P.S. I changed your hair page so it just says your first name... okay?

I'm sorry.

You are a little reindeer! I can't believe you! You made me leave the house without a jacket, and I'm totally freezing! That's what I get for not listening to you! You have been a good girl this year, and Santa has just a few more things he has to make in his elf shop for you, little girl. Santa is going to be a little late getting back from work. So I want to see you (in a christmas bow) waiting for Santa sometime before 3:00 P.M.
Don't argue with me, I'm Santa. Things are going to be as I say they are! Now be a good little girl, put a smile on that face, and wait for your Santa. (little elf dance)
I hate you! I love you! I hate you!

I love you,

-K

By the way, the candlestick was for us... plus two more cards.
Say hi to Cody for me.

That bum didn't send back the contracts or a check, am I just too naive?

-K

Yes, that was my first sale...
and yes, I should see you @ 5:15, the party is expected to last 1 hour.

P.S. There might be a bonus check as a christmas gift from my boss
Keep your fingers crossed for big $!

Today seems to be negotiation day for us. I just closed that account I was talking about this morning! All we need is the guys check and it's on! Great job on telling Nikole what was up with her Mom. That is so weird about Kyle and Nikole calling, both with funky moms. I love you, and have an extra candy cane for you.

-K

This could be bad for any "trial" they are gonna have for Saddam.
Makes us look like an ass is what it does.

Sounds great! I can't wait to see it. I'm sure you did a great job, after all, you are a proffesional. Work is the same as always, hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror. I love you, and will see you at 3pm.

P.S. You are a good girl, and Santa has you on his "Nice" list.

Hey, I (you) got you a present, You (I) hope I (you) like it. I'm absolutely sure you'll love it, as you picked it out. I can't wait to see what I (you) got you for christmas.

Action figures that are a little odd. These are very funny, and right up to the minute. Don't forget to get your "Captured Saddam" doll. Then you can get Bush and Blair and have a tea party!

A lion remains a lion even if captured. I agree with the idea that Saddam was possibly on drugs when captured. If not his own cocktail of painkillers, then maybe something given by his captors to keep him docile. Then don't forget, he was armed when they caught him. Why didn't he just pop a couple caps into the soldiers who were gonna pull him from his "spider hole"? Not that that would be a good thing or anything, but it's what I expected from the "Rogue leader of the Axis of Evil". He went down pretty much like anyone would, after being dogged since March. I still want to know where he gets his hair colored.

With all the news about capturing Saddam Hussein, I'm glad someone is focused on his lack of grey hair or roots. I'm pretty sure this could be spun up into a larger story. Like who IS Saddam's hairdresser? What color does he use? How often does he get his hair done. These are the questions the world demands be answered!

Hi baby, I got moved to my own desk at work today. It's really cool. I have a brand spankin' new computer (much faster than my old win95), my own regular phone and extension, and drawers and all that shit. I'm a big pimp now! How are ya doing today? Any news, or new appointments? Your my little skittle. ;-) wink wink

Second day of work on "Married to the Kellys", and those people couldn't be nicer. Very funny, relaxed, quick and talented. Maybe I like them so much because they are treating me so well. It feels like a real family that I happen to be staying with for a couple of days. Met some old friends as well as made some new ones. I will be going into work at 1 p.m. I know, rough huh?

Just had a full fire drill here at work. The entire building emptied out onto the streets. Damn! There are a bunch of people who work in our building! We stretched all the way from wilshire to 6th street. One person in our office was designated as being "dead". I saved an entire floor of people from burning to death, after hearing some knocking behind a fire door, I opened it, and saw 20 or so people who were trapped behind a locked door. They looked almost as relieved as if it were a real fire when I opened the door and saved their "lives". Got separated from my office, then grouped up with them once back out on the street. We almost had two "dead" when one of the guys in our office thought it was a good time to take a piss break. We found him ten minutes later. Then it took longer to get back in the building, as they had closed the stairs and the whole building had to compete for elevators to get back to their floors. Very exciting

*** NEWS ALERT ***

Los Angeles, Ca -
The public is just learning of the awakening of one Janet Lazar, hairdresser. She was spotted waking up in her stylish Hollywood, California bungalow. Reports of cuteness have been confirmed. This up to the minute report has been filed recently as we have learned of her possible employment at Prive Salon, one of the trendiest and most exclusive salons in Southern California. More on this to follow in the next couple of days.

-K

Nothing much going on over here today. It's the calm after the storm. I did come across a pretty hot lead today, and I will try to sell them on our service in the next 24 hours. I like it here when it's nice and mellow. Very good to hear JR is coming Fri. He's been a great client for you. I miss you, and can't wait to see you after work. Meow. Purr, purr.

-K

OK baby, hope you enjoyed your tacos. I'm still very busy here, don't know when I'll be home. I can't imagine that they will need me after 5. I'll keep you updated.

Oh really! What, did she wash her hair with Ajax? Are you feeling OK? Do you need some soup and crackers? Let me know, and I'll pick some food up on my way home...
-K

I hope you are feeling better. Everybody has their horns on here at work. "Python" - hiss hiss. If you need anything, call pink dot and have them bring it to you. (just use the card) I don't know how late I will be working today, probably 3 or 4, it is the busiest and craziest day they have had all year. Nothing new in the gossip arena, except that I found out we handle Ron Jeremy's calls, we are so busy, no one even has time for a joke or a jab. Usually we are a very fun office, but when I came in this morning, it was like I was at the law firm that represents Scott Peterson, or Michael Jackson. No fun. Fuck it. I'll make it fun. I'll put Visine in the coffee pot, that ought to get things moving here

How was parking? Did you stop and ask one of those parking enforcement Nazis if it was cool on Labor day? What about flag day? Are you going to the supply store at 11:00? What's happening with that dirty black kitten that was drinking stagnant water in the alley? Tell me everything!!!

Good for you! If we can't do anything about the M.S., at least we can go after the Perverts! I can't fucking believe that crazy ass shit! If this were another country, he'd have his penis cut off for offending women, kids, and small furry animals.

Did you hear the one about the Parents that took their young son to Michael Jackson's house, received a bunch of money, and immediately called the cops, complaining of the molestation of their only child...

Neither did I...

Going crazy- shit is almost finished up over here. I will get off in a half-hour or so.

When Michael Jackson was dangling his child off the balcony for the press, it seems that R. Kelly was waiting down below.

Sounds great!
See ya after 5:00pm!
Love ya...
-K

Yes, call DD. I probably will work till 5 tomorrow as well. That's great you have John Redding! See, all of your clients are gonna hit you up at least one more time b4 the holidays.

See ya after work.

Love and kisses
-K

She owes us a total of $130. $125 for returned check and $5 for fee. She obviously didn't take care of it that day, and the bank has been trying to clear the check since last Thur. They gave us the benefit of the doubt until this morning. Couldn't have happened at a better time. See how she is, and let her know what has happened. Get her to mail you a payment, in cash... that should take care of it. Maybe make some mac & cheese for me for tomorrow's lunch. I have $4 cash. Funny how stuff like this works out in the end. Hang in there little kitten.

-K

Wanda bounced the check!
We have nothing!
They took $5 for insufficient funds from us
and the whole amount of Wanda's check!

We are totally at the wrong end of the money stick!

Funny... haha

Things are one big fricken HAIRBALL at work! Hectic as shit... I need to wear my brooks bros. shirt with a tie tomorrow... meeting with clients now! Funny thing is, I barely know what the fuck I'm doing! I have prepared two proposals today, and am following up on a whole slew of new towing clients. This shit is crazy, like me. I miss you, and love you so much. I just wanted to say that I am sorry for the last couple of weeks, and you have been great during this time, very patient. I don't know why you put up with me, and I will work very hard to be the man that you need. I love you more than you will ever know. And I will see you later, we can talk, or whatever.... I want to have fun with you again! And if it's my fault, then pinch me on the butt and call me stupid.

-K

Bryant
Blake
Peterson
Jackson
Stewart
Specter

Someone is gonna go to jail.

I propose floating a bond of $15 Billion dollars.... Oh wait.... That's Arnold Schwarzenegger's new job, sorry. :)

How's that VH1 workin' out for ya? I just got word that I will be promoted to the Medical Client Relations Department as of tomorrow. My Schedule may change, as well as my pay. This may be a pretty good Christmas after all. :)

Cool, I mean, not cool, but cool. We are half-way there. At least you got O. Heck, the game-show network will be better than God and Golf on Sunday. See you around 3-ish...

No, I have not bought any smokes today. I will be kicking right along-side you. (bites nails)

Heard a great story. A small child had called for a product for their grandmother, we needed to know the grandma's age, the child wasn't sure, but said she would check the back of her underwear, because the child's underwear said for age 5-6, and she was sure that Grandma's underwear would list her age as well.

Back to work.... Hi ho, Hi ho.... I would like to take this opportunity to say hello to my Froobie. Nothing new in the news except for the death of Art Carney. Also, Christian Slater ended up in the hospital in Vegas after an argument with his wife. Oh, I did hear that I now am in possesion of a clip from the Paris Hilton sex tape.

Question, who in God's name is stupid enough to do that in this day and age?

Answer, Paris Hilton.